I’ve been living with infertility for nearly two years now and I still feel like a newbie. Every time I turn around, there’s something new to learn. I never knew we had our own day! Why shouldn’t we? We deserve one! I love that it’s called Infertility Survival Day and not something froo froo. We are warriors combatting illnesses within our own bodies! These are illnesses that threaten our health, wellbeing, and our overall pursuit of happiness. Shame on our doctors for not finding these before we show up at their doors inquiring as to why we are unable to conceive! We are not accepting excuses, we will not accept anything other than real answers and treatment tailored to our individual health needs! Heck yeah, we are surviving this!
So how did I celebrate today? Okay, I didn’t. I didn’t even know about it until about 1:00 when I checked Facebook after Church. After which I went out into my garden and started clearing away leaves, and debris that had been deposited over the winter. I’ve been working on this for the last few weekends and I’m about ¾ of the way done.
About half an hour into my work, I took a break and sat on our front porch with my husband, Frank. He asked about my health, having observed an improvement in my mood and my ability to tackle projects around the house lately. He was right. I hadn’t thought of that. I know that I’ve been feeling better, there’s no denying that. But thinking back on how I used to feel before surgery reminded me that the same gardening I did today would have knocked me out only a year ago! Something as simple as planting two flats of flowers would have rendered me useless for the rest of the day!
But today, I worked in my yard, and I still have energy to prep my meals during my grain free power hours this evening! This is huge for me. I am able to live and enjoy life again! And, may I say, I hope the doctor who told me that my lack of energy was caused by depression is happy to learn that she was wrong when I tell her it was caused by endometriosis at my annual appointment over the summer!
Sorry for that little rant, but I can’t help but feel a bit of vindication in knowing that I will be able to share this with her face to face! But; back to the garden. I’m going somewhere with this…
It occurred to me that my work in the garden today is rather metaphorical. While I was clearing away debris to allow for the growth of new life, I was caring for my garden in the same way that my NaPro surgeon and NaPro doctor are caring for me and my fertility. Think about it… The endometriosis was growing in my abdominal cavity and was around my tubes, ovaries, intestines and colon, virtually strangling me from the inside. Thanks to Dr. C and Dr. B. I’ve been freed from that strangulation and my body is now preparing to nurture new life. It seems that I celebrated our day without even knowing it.